Daily Struggles

It’s been a ongoing thing with my daughter we never seem to agree on anything .She acts like I owe her for all that has gone wrong in her life .Even though I did what  a parent is suppose to do and say “no”,”stop that “,”If you do that one more time”? …………I could ever hardly get her to stay home ,stop smoking cigarettes,wear some different clothes ,It always came down to “What she had to have”? or she would do something to frustrate me in order to give in just for her to leave me alone ,that was not good, I know.! she was at an age to where I stop spanking them .How old is to old to spank ?I chose the age 13 ,WTF? Is that to old ?Should I have been more strict?I was a  single parent ,raising 4 kids and worked 2 jobs to provide for them with a ,home,food,shoes,tiolet paper,the list goes on and on ………. That is called the cycle of life ,Now she acts like .I’m suppose to provide for her and my grandson,I dont want to be mean and so “no” all the time ,but is that ”WHAT BEING A GRANPARENT  CONSISTS OF?”IM going to post short stories like this thru out this site .I hope they can be read by mothers or  daughters or there son, If they can relate in some shape,form,or fashion from:lucyhttp://lucys.catcodesigns.net/

We all have personal struggles.

The struggle that I face is somewhat similar to the one that you face. Not that it has all of the same factors involved but in the respect of how I deal with it will affect what my stress level is, what I do (or not do) will impact those around me and I have to live with the choice that I make whether it is good, bad or ugly.

Even the smallest decision can have a rippling wave of effects.

I have a son who is in college but I wasn’t trained or educated in the same fashion as large educational institutions do. So the way that he finds solutions to his everyday life issues is greatly different than that of myself. He however is left with the same result. The result of what he does impacts him, his mom, myself and all of his extended family.

He is the product of his environment but is that always true?

Can he choose to complete his education even if his mom or dad didn’t? Well, of course he can, he can make the decision to steer his life in a direction to better himself. The odds of changing ones self is the struggle that I mention.

I myself grew up very poor. my mom always had to do the best that she could do to provide for us (myself and five siblings) by herself. My dad ,I believe, paid child support of a total of $100.00 one time (for 6 kids). I of course did not know about this fact until I was much older. I  got into trouble as a kid and was set from the start off on the wrong path. I am not blaming them for the choices and mistakes that I have made I am stating this more as a statement of how I got to be here.

Overcoming the odds of repeating bad examples is a very hard task. Not falling into the same patterns that seem to destroy families and ones person are a hard thing to do. It is easy to follow in the footsteps of those around you. When you are young and impressionable and steered slightly off course how can you just one day wake up and say “I will make the changes that I need to make to better myself” ?

The changes are hard to even start to do. Think about it, it took a lifetime to get to the point where you are observant enough to see that the problem exists. We can be told many times that a problem or issue is there and not see how it effects the rest of our life or not understand what the underlying root cause is. Then we have to become willing to accept we have the issue and be willing to go to any length to try to solve our problem.

Overcoming any issue then lies on one factor. Recognising that it is cause is the root problem. How can I be inside the box and tell you what it looks like from the outside. We can’t we can just make stabs in the dark at what we might believe is the cause.